Video Games
by Alex Beckett
Summary: After minding Little Neal, Belle does a bit of thinking and reflecting on just how badly she wants to be a mother. What happens when she tells Rumplestiltskin? What if he doesn't want to add on to their family? But then… what if he does?


**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, minus the one name you won't recognize.**

**This one-shot is for lekaleidoscopedmarine :)**

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><p>After the Charmings returned from their 'night out,' or whatever it was that they had been doing, Belle started the walk home to her pink house on Noir Street, and all she could think about was how she'd felt holding baby Neal.<p>

Happy.

No… more than that.

_Blissful._

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><p>She'd always loved children, and even as a small child, she would take every opportunity to help the servants look after the children of other visiting royalty and gentry. In the later years, during the beginning of Avonlea's downfall, when she'd been avoiding anything and everything to do with Gaston and her betrothal duties, she'd find herself daydreaming about motherhood… although she'd never envisioned any more of them being with him.<p>

Not after the miscarriage.

Not after she'd had to deliver a stillborn baby alone when the castle had been under attack by the peasants. Everyone had forgotten about the pregnant princess… then again, a lot of people—even her own staff—thought her to be a whore when she'd fallen pregnant before a wedding date had even been set.

It wasn't her fault she'd been cornered and taken advantage of by Gaston after he'd returned home to the castle, drunk on wine, after a particularly successful hunting party. (The rest of his men had all been varying stages of drunk, too, but they'd all fallen asleep the second they could) It wasn't her fault that Gaston had been so strong. It wasn't Belle's fault that she was very fertile.

Yet, Belle had—no, still—_truly_ loved her baby daughter.

She was born late at night, and as Belle thought about it in the years to come, she realized that she'd never seen so many stars in the sky before as she had on that night.

Perhaps that was why she'd decided to name her daughter Starlit.

Starlit, who had been born asleep.

Starlit, whom Gaston hadn't even bothered to see. Even when Belle wept uncontrollably for hours after the little one's passing.

Starlit, whom Belle had had to bury. By herself.

Because nobody had cared. But her.

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><p>Fast forward all these decades later, and she had gotten to meet her love's wonderful son. Neal.<p>

What a great guy he'd been.

Okay, so he'd had his faults, but near the end, he had been working on patching things up with his father and with Emma, too.

And in the times when nobody had been looking, Neal had extended the hand of friendship to Belle, a first step in establishing some kind of deep relationship with her.

He didn't have to say it, but he had been looking for a mother and Belle would have been delighted to fill that role for him, had they had more time.

But no… like Starlit, Neal was gone too soon.

He'd died a hero's death, but even at that, Belle wept uncontrollably for ages, the way she had on the night Starlit went to join all the other stars in the sky. Belle had actually lost another child. She and Rumplestiltskin did their best to comfort each other, but it was hard for her to comfort him about a subject like this because he hadn't been there the first time it had happened to her.

And it had never once mattered that Neal was way older than her; she'd still thought of him as her boy and had loved him that way, not realizing it until she'd knelt at his grave, by herself.

If only…

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><p>And now, there was the Charmings' beautiful baby boy, named in honor of hers.<p>

And tonight, she'd had the privilege of babysitting baby Neal.

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><p>He had been so little and just happy as a clam, drinking from his bottle and later, falling asleep in her arms. She could have put him down in his crib and let him sleep while she sang him a lullaby and the sheep on his mobile danced overhead.<p>

But Belle had been greedy, something that she didn't feel often, and she sat with him in the rocking chair, telling him story after story as she held him close. Sweet little Neal had laid contently in Belle's arms, pressing his body against hers as he got hooked on her smell and she on his. He'd even rested one of his little cheeks against her breast, something he only did when he was in Snow's arms because it comforted him. Because she was his mother.

Even though looking after the baby had brought her so much joy, it had still been with reluctance that she'd given him back.

It was also a stark reminder that he wasn't hers. And that she didn't have one of her own anymore.

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><p>"Sweetheart? Are you alright?"<p>

Belle just about jumped out her skin; she'd been so far gone in her autopilot mode that she hadn't even realized that she'd let herself into the house, or that her husband was watching her curiously.

"Yes, Rumplestiltskin," she came up to him, offering him a reassuring smile. "I'm fine."

Rumple had lived a very, very long time, and in all that time—even at the height of his evilness—he'd come to know that whenever a woman said that she was 'fine,' she was hiding something, no matter how reassuring the tone or beautiful the smile.

"You only call me by my full name these days when you're being serious." He cupped her face in his big broad hands, calloused with time and many, many years of straw spinning. "What are you thinking?"

Big fat puppy dog tears cascaded down her cheeks and her bottom lip trembled as the she tried to formulate the words. When they failed, she held one of her hands against her trim stomach.

"A-are you pregnant?" The wizard asked, hardly daring to believe that he'd truly gotten a wish fulfilled without even telling his wife that he'd wanted it in the first place.

"No." Belle finally managed to answer. "I'm not."

Rumplestiltskin's heart sank in disappointment, and he couldn't say anything for a minute.

"I'm not pregnant," Belle repeated. "And I didn't lose another one."

A weight Rumplestiltskin hadn't even realized he was holding felt lifted off his shoulders. "Then what is it?"

"I-I..."

Belle had to wonder why she was having so much trouble saying this one thing.

"I want a baby, Rumplestiltskin. I want us to have a baby." She finally managed. "I've wanted this for so long."

"How long?"

"Since my time Dark Castle with you." she admitted. "Since that day in the forest when I stopped you from killing Robin. I already loved you, but that was when I knew that no matter what the future had in store for us, you were it for me. I knew that there was no other man I'd rather have a family with."

Rumplestilstkin started. That had been _decades_ ago. She'd captured his attention the first time he ever saw her, but she hadn't captured his heart until that day he'd caught her when she'd taken a tumble off the ladder and he'd caught her. He even went on to put all of the castle's ladders in the doorless vault because he couldn't stand the idea of her accidentally breaking her neck, or any other bone in her body, for that matter, because she'd fallen off a stupid ladder.

"I've known for just a little bit longer than that that you are the one I want to be mother to my children." He admitted. "Since the day you fell off the ladder."

Belle actually giggled a little, making all previous angst the pair had been feeling earlier evaporate into nothing.

"Really? Then why didn't we ever say anything to each other?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, dearie." He held her fingers to her lips and kissed them. "But it doesn't matter now. May I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"What's bringing this all on?"

Belle's heart grew heavy again. "When I was minding Neal tonight, I was thinking about Starlit. What would things have been like if she hadn't died before she took her first breath? Would you still have taken me?"

"If you were still as miserable as we both knew you were? Absolutely... although I would have been a lot nicer to you if she'd been with us."

"Oh, really?"

"Mhm. I would have taught her about magic if she so desired, but I would have most definitely spoiled her rotten. Imagine the times the three of us could have had together, exploring the Infinite Forest."

"Oooo, that would have _would_ have been fun. Any child with my curiosity and our combined upbringing would have the time of their life."

Belle raked her nails over her lower stomach, thinking of her empty womb.

"I was also thinking of our Neal, and how I was beginning to think of him as my flesh and blood, even if I knew him for a short time after hearing about him for so long. I didn't know until I met him how much I wanted to give him a sibling."

Only because the moment had been private at the time and Neal was telling Belle a secret, she didn't tell her own husband now that Neal had once confessed he'd always wanted a baby sister.

"We still can, Belle. Guess what?"

She looked up at him with hope and endearment. "Do tell."

"I was actually planning to have this talk with you very soon."

Belle's knees buckled in surprise and Rumplestiltskin caught her when she stumbled.

"I've got you. Shhh, shhh, shhh…"

Belle was crying again. "I guess this is what happens when time has been our enemy for so many decades—we get shy and put things off."

"Well," Rumplestiltskin took his wife by the hand and started leading her to the stairs. "Let's change that, love. Does that sound like a good idea?"

Belle nodded and let him lead her to the bedroom.

"Yes."

They were going to have a baby.

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><p><strong>I hope you all enjoyed that :)<br>**

**There won't be any reasons for follows because this is a one-shot, but I would love to hear your thoughts in a review :)**


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